Saturday, May 21, 2011

Lost in Identity

So many people tell me that I’m crazy, I’m so sick of it. I am done with people yelling and screaming. Curses are at the top of my list, I hear them all the time I’m so sick of people judging and calling other people out on things. I have been called out, or judged for something I haven’t done. So today I am declaring that I am emancipated from all of that. Today I declare that you are no longer able to judge me, in anyway, shape or form. My name is Morgan Fae, and this is my story. After you finish reading, think about this. What would you do in my situation?
    From what I can tell the morning was still the morning. The sunshine filled the small room I was vacating, the ugly hotel curtains parted fully so that every last nook and cranny was filled with the baby sun. I looked around. My bag leaned against the wall over flowing with my clothing and essentials, the beige colored walls stared lifelessly at me and I stared back fully aware that I needed to change my look again. I grabbed my bag dragging out the dye, makeup, fake moles, contacts, fake freckles and other things out of a small bag wrapped in plastic. Leaning against the sink I pinched out the color contacts that left my eyes looking like their normal green with red-rimmed whites. The mirror stared back at me- well the me in the mirror looked back at me- I couldn’t remember what I looked like before I ran away. I remember my eyes and skin color, but my body shape, hair, birthmarks and other things; I could not. My name was Morgan Fae, but it could be anything now. Right now I was Katniss Gentry. I had been Ever Moisse, Alyson Noel, Mirissa Laurence. I was the girl who was a run-away, labeled as a freak, a mishap, I wasn’t supposed to live theses past months because I had gotten good at hiding my true identity. I was a lone wolf, and I was never going back.
    I scrubbed away the make up on my face ignoring the stinging of a minor cut on my left cheek. I let the water wash away all the past night. I looked at the shower; wanting to feel the hot water on my skin, too ease the months away. I looked around and peeked under the sink, Bleach sat there. I smiled. Hotels were so stupid, but hey! The stupid are meant to be taken advantage of. Otherwise, why else were they here? I cranked the tap and let the hot water steam into the glass-covered shower. I yanked the long brown wig off my head and threw it to the floor; it landed with a thud on a huge flower tile. My own short pixie cut hair flopped out, the blonde color shocking the boring colors all around me. I looked like me. I wasn’t bad looking; I had straight teeth and full lips. I was always the popular girl in my old school (not listed for fear of being ratted by one of you readers) always talked about, always envied. But that was before, and this is now. Stepping out of my clothes I stepped into the shower. Letting all the passed weeks slowly dissolve into a steam of memories and bad ideas, all the hard dirt and grime being washed away as well.
    After my well-deserved shower I stood wrapped in a towel with my new wig on a mannequin head and scissors bared between my fingers scrutinizing how I should cut it. I settled on a cute choppy cut with bangs and layers. All in all it was a good haircut, I looked cute with bangs; that’s something to remember. As for my clothing I decided on a skirt with a tee shirt that hung low almost to the end of my plaid skirt, and cute ballet flats.  Looked in the mirror. My face looked plain. I placed a spray of fake freckles over my nose and put in two bright green/gold eye contacts.

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